THE CRAZY KINGS OF ROME
Caligula was mad
Perhaps he was bad,
But he did make the Romans sad.
One fine day,
Caligula went to the Roman army to say:
“My warriors! You see,
Neptune, the god of the sea,
Has waged war on we!
So north we will go,
And stop the sea’s flow,
By stabbing the waves,
Where they hit the rocks and caves!”
So the army’s legions
Marched across many regions,
And reached the northern bay,
Where they stabbed in dismay,
At the ocean!
This happened many a day,
Till a general could say,
“ Let it be heard:
We have been stabbing for hours,
and now finally, victory is ours!”
At which the soldiers cheered.
However back home they couldn’t go,
For to march triumphantly to Rome,
They must have a trophy to show!
So, to go back home,
They each found,
By searching miles around,
A single sea shell,
And finally marched home to the ringing of a bell!
However, Caligula, was still intent
In making his horse a senator
As you can imagine, the other senators were not content!
A few days later, causing much disorder,
Happened Caligula’s murder!
So next came Nero,
Who thought himself a hero!
But, to make the Romans happy, failed even Nero-
When the fire of Rome
Was destroying houses, pillars and domes,
He sat singing and playing his lyre
While Rome burned like a funeral pyre.
Well, he may or may not have been a hero,
But he did succeed in letting Rome burn to zero!
A few years later, Domitian came along,
But even he didn’t succeed in pleasing the Roman throng.
He built himself a palace with a great big dome,
So he could invite lots of guests home !
However, this invitation was a deadly one!
Why?
Because, after all the feasting and fun was done,
And all the guests were in their beds,
In the morning, they saw,
A guest was dead!
And Domitian had cut off and displayed his head,
All gory, bloody, and red!
As the guests cowered in fear,
Or shed a tear,
Domitian gave an evil sneer!
Domitian may or may not have been right,
But he did give his guests a fright!
-Devanshika Bajpai
